we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
