how can u be prego again
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
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