If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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