your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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