Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize