Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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