so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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