..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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