One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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