Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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