I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
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Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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