how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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