No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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