So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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