this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
it glows. i had to have it.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
