I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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