I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
