Texts From Last Night

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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.

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  (573): Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving. http://tfl.nu/96e5
  Replies (33) Good night (734) Bad night (3120)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!

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  (917): I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done! http://tfl.nu/5vwu
  Replies (18) Good night (1381) Bad night (2633)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.

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  (214): I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off. http://tfl.nu/qpy6
  Replies (38) Good night (521) Bad night (4256)
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  (707): View more from California

  tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?

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  (707): tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers? http://tfl.nu/o0vq
  Replies (16) Good night (864) Bad night (4696)
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  (626): View more from California

  Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.

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  (626): Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive. http://tfl.nu/gm46
  Replies (11) Good night (4239) Bad night (496)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.

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  (503): iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane. http://tfl.nu/zl9e
  Replies (18) Good night (6467) Bad night (1088)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.

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  (608): I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs. http://tfl.nu/6w3y
  Replies (31) Good night (6358) Bad night (955)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?

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  (973): You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later? http://tfl.nu/a1oo
  Replies (18) Good night (6178) Bad night (964)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?

  (810): View more from Michigan

  shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you

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  (907): I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone? (810): shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you http://tfl.nu/u0b0
  Replies (13) Good night (2320) Bad night (674)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"

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  (334): Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!" http://tfl.nu/kpjr
  Replies (4) Good night (986) Bad night (408)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.

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  (832): Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start. http://tfl.nu/gyl1
  Replies (8) Good night (552) Bad night (1135)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?

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  (815): holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas? http://tfl.nu/9590
  Replies (3) Good night (601) Bad night (334)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?

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  (717): You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING? http://tfl.nu/nnf3
  Replies (3) Good night (625) Bad night (228)
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  (308): View more from Nebraska

  I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas

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  (308): I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas http://tfl.nu/d21x
  Replies (1) Good night (316) Bad night (137)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..

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  (440): Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix.. http://tfl.nu/v9u4
  Replies (1) Good night (173) Bad night (351)

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