And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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