Three words: puerto rican gang bang
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
