dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
