my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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