I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize