So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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