I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
