Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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