once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Randomize
