just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize