It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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