My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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