you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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