Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
