I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
