It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
is that a dick in a sweater?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
