He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
