mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
