is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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