Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
