she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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