so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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