Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
