did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
