I wish I could punch you in the face.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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