A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
