Sponge bath it is.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
