Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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