oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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