Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
