Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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