I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
