you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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