I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
