Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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